Jump to content

*Stretch* [updated 3/11]


  • Please log in to reply
18 replies to this topic

#1 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 07 March 2011 - 04:43

*yawns*

Hey folks! My spring break starts next week. I've been taking the full 18 college credit hours this semester so i've been pretty busy. I'm currently working on an animation for one of my classes (due this coming friday) and I was wondering if ya'll could offer as much criticism as possible. I personally have noted a few things that i did wrong that i need to fix, but I'll leave it open for ya'll to find. (Which ever ones get found first get fixed first.)


-------

Submitted version: [3/11/11]



Thank you for helping everyone! Lemme know what ya'll think!

-------

UPDATE [3/9/11]:


-------

Oko's Animation for 3d Animation 2 Class
---

While i'm around I'm also going to go check out how the GGT has been doing. Unless Roan would like to do it again, I was planning on running it again this summer. There were a few things I was thinking of adding... but i'll probably open up a discussion on it closer to June.

---

Anyways, if anybody has any criticism about the animation^ I would be happy to hear it. :mrgreen:

#2 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 07 March 2011 - 04:46

*yawns*

Hey folks! My spring break starts next week. I've been taking the full 18 college credit hours this semester so i've been pretty busy. I'm currently working on an animation for one of my classes (due this coming friday) and I was wondering if ya'll could offer as much criticism as possible. I personally have noted a few things that i did wrong that i need to fix, but I'll leave it open for ya'll to find. (Which ever ones get found first get fixed first.)

Oko's Animation for 3d Animation 2 Class

---

While i'm around I'm also going to go check out how the GGT has been doing. Unless Roan would like to do it again, I was planning on running it again this summer. There were a few things I was thinking of adding... but i'll probably open up a discussion on it closer to June.

---

Anyways, if anybody has any criticism about the animation^ I would be happy to hear it. :mrgreen:


His fingers are too thick :D

Give him some color maybe? and let the ball bounce in :D

need more? :P

#3 TreeFrog

TreeFrog

    Veteran

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 2,739 posts
  • Badge

Posted 07 March 2011 - 04:48

No offense to Roan, but we really need you running the GGT. Its been a little disorganized.

#4 fs_abhishek11

fs_abhishek11
  • Guests

Posted 07 March 2011 - 04:54

ooO00hhh~~! That's awesome !~ Good to see you back Oko :D

#5 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 07 March 2011 - 04:58

His fingers are too thick :D

Give him some color maybe? and let the ball bounce in :D

need more? :P



The model was provided for us but yes, I agree, the fingers are too think. (He can't even make a fist without the fingers going through each other. XD) I'll try making the ball bounce in. :)


@Treefrog, I think Roan did fairly well. My first time running it was also disorganized, but I had everything written out. Roan was sort of thrown into it without any help. (My fault really. I said I would pm him with the things i learned and the rules i made, but i never did. >.<)

@Abhishek, Its good to somewhat-be-back! At least for 2 weeks until school kicks me back into submission! :P

#6 fs_abhishek11

fs_abhishek11
  • Guests

Posted 07 March 2011 - 05:10

and if you are going to do the GGT this summer it would be awesome.. If unable to , don't forget to pass on the ideas this time :P

#7 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 07 March 2011 - 05:20

and if you are going to do the GGT this summer it would be awesome.. If unable to , don't forget to pass on the ideas this time :P


I might be able to run it in the summer ;)

#8 fs_abhishek11

fs_abhishek11
  • Guests

Posted 07 March 2011 - 05:59

You should be entering ~_~ not hosting ~_~

#9 Sahardy

Sahardy

    Veteran

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 1,399 posts

Posted 07 March 2011 - 11:33

The ball doesn't roll smooth enough. It comes to sudden stops instead of slowing down to a stop. It looks unnatural to me. :3

Sahardy.gif
good photographyer. great drawer. but im most best at photoshop.

 


#10 fs_koljaver

fs_koljaver
  • Guests

Posted 08 March 2011 - 00:24

1. His eyes look... weird... ?
2. When the purple ball rolls in first, it kinda rolls unrealistically. Make it roll more realistically, lol.
3. When the dude flicks the ball, it kind of stops too fast.

Otherwise it's good! :)

#11 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 08 March 2011 - 23:29

The ball doesn't roll smooth enough. It comes to sudden stops instead of slowing down to a stop. It looks unnatural to me. :3


1. His eyes look... weird... ?
2. When the purple ball rolls in first, it kinda rolls unrealistically. Make it roll more realistically, lol.
3. When the dude flicks the ball, it kind of stops too fast.

Otherwise it's good! :)



Noted and fixed. :)
(Both times)

His eyes were modeled like that by someone else. The character was assigned to us. But I agree, his eyes are weird. :P

I was able to animate more today, and he now stands back up and flicks the ball into the air, but I don't have it rendered yet. Tomorrow, i'll animate some more and render it out so ya'll can see and critique the new parts.

[What I fixed]
-his left hand clamped down on his left knee to quickly when he bent down. It now has a smoother animation
-I eased in and eased out the ball when it rolls in
-I eased out the ball when he flicks it so that it doesn't stop suddenly
-I added the next sequence where he finishes standing up and regains his balance
-I added another fake ball so that he can throw it into the air***
-And I adjusted several different motions so that it looked like he was throwing his weight around more.


*** So, when animating in 3dsMax, I found that i needed to create 2 balls so that he can actually pick it up. I tried to just have one ball, but in order for the ball to move with his hand, I wanted to "parent" it to the hand. (It would basically adopt the hand's movements) But If I did that, then all the previous animations on the ball would be messed up. So, I made a second ball that will stay invisible until the exact moment that the hand grabs it. At the exact same time, the original ball on the ground goes invisible. So it looks like it's just one ball being picked up. I then did the same thing later on when he tosses the ball into the air. The "hand ball" stays in the palm of his hand, and a third ball gets animated and tossed into the air.

I'll print screen a snapshot of what i mean tomorrow when I get back to class. :P

#12 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 10 March 2011 - 04:34




^Here's the update. Again, I could use as much criticism as possible. :)

#13 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 10 March 2011 - 04:42




^Here's the update. Again, I could use as much criticism as possible. :)


Don't like the new wall.

The ball should roll in from the front, like it did before.

The ball starts slow and then speeds up and then comes to an awkward stop when he pushes it .. fix that :)

Is the ball lopsided?

He needs to look to the side when he's surprised if you're keeping the ball from the side :D

#14 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 10 March 2011 - 04:50

Don't like the new wall.

The ball should roll in from the front, like it did before.

The ball starts slow and then speeds up and then comes to an awkward stop when he pushes it .. fix that :)

Is the ball lopsided?

He needs to look to the side when he's surprised if you're keeping the ball from the side :D


Lol, the new wall and the way the ball came in never changed, I only changed the location of the camera so that the ball didn't go out of the frame when it is thrown into the air. :P
However, the fact that you don't like it means that I need to change something to make it more appealing. I didn't notice the irregular movement of the ball when he pushes it, so I'll fix that one asap when i get to class tomorrow. And then no lol, the ball stays 100% round. :P (Youtube may have stretched the video? Either way, i'll double check and make sure i didn't accidentally mess with the balls transformations)

When you say that he should look to the side, do you mean his double take? Besides that and when he's standing back up, he has his eyes trained on the ball.


Thank you for your critique. I didn't notice that the ball started slow when he hit it. ^^

#15 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 10 March 2011 - 04:56


Don't like the new wall.

The ball should roll in from the front, like it did before.

The ball starts slow and then speeds up and then comes to an awkward stop when he pushes it .. fix that :)

Is the ball lopsided?

He needs to look to the side when he's surprised if you're keeping the ball from the side :D


Lol, the new wall and the way the ball came in never changed, I only changed the location of the camera so that the ball didn't go out of the frame when it is thrown into the air. :P
However, the fact that you don't like it means that I need to change something to make it more appealing. I didn't notice the irregular movement of the ball when he pushes it, so I'll fix that one asap when i get to class tomorrow. And then no lol, the ball stays 100% round. :P (Youtube may have stretched the video? Either way, i'll double check and make sure i didn't accidentally mess with the balls transformations)

When you say that he should look to the side, do you mean his double take? Besides that and when he's standing back up, he has his eyes trained on the ball.


Thank you for your critique. I didn't notice that the ball started slow when he hit it. ^^


Different color ceiling maybe? :)

Also just noticed, his feet seem to stomp on the ground rather than flow ;)

And the way he looks around just doesn't seem natural - atleast, before he sees the ball.

#16 fs_okomakiako

fs_okomakiako
  • Guests

Posted 12 March 2011 - 01:51




^Final Version.

I would also like to give a HUGE thanks to everyone that helped me out. ^^

Lemme know what ya think! I'm also open to all criticism. I can always improve it. :mrgreen:

#17 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 12 March 2011 - 02:04




^Final Version.

I would also like to give a HUGE thanks to everyone that helped me out. ^^

Lemme know what ya think! I'm also open to all criticism. I can always improve it. :mrgreen:


Nice that you fixed the wall :)

One thing I noticed, the shadow is going WAAAY too fast considering the speed the ball is falling at. And he didn't seem to throw it that fast ... make it slower ;)

#18 fs_koljaver

fs_koljaver
  • Guests

Posted 12 March 2011 - 03:30

Looks great!

But as AA said, the shadow for the guy + the ball flying in the air was kind of off. The shadow didn't really match the guy and the ball, lol.

Well, I shouldn't really be critizing, because what you just did is 10000000000000000000x better than what I can do. :P

#19 aa0007

aa0007

    Veteran

  • New Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 4,379 posts
  • United States of America

Posted 12 March 2011 - 03:42

Looks great!

But as AA said, the shadow for the guy + the ball flying in the air was kind of off. The shadow didn't really match the guy and the ball, lol.

Well, I shouldn't really be critizing, because what you just did is 10000000000000000000x better than what I can do. :P


Hey, once you learn 3ds max (which I'll be doing senior year high school :P), you can do it too :D

I already know autocad with some decency and can do basic functions in inventor :)


1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

Font:
Arial | Calibri | Lucida Console | Verdana
 
Font Size:
9px | 10px | 11px | 12px | 10pt | 12pt
 
Color: